World’s Shortest Stories: Bedtime Story

In this part, we are going to examine translations already done and see how WE would translate them were we in the translator’s shoes. We suggest that you read the translation first and see how much you build a relation with it, how much it affects you, and if it is understandable enough. Then read the English text and assess how much it changes your viewpoint of the story. In the end, post your comments - be them the strong or weak points of the translation or suggestions for a different translation.
We start with the World’s Shortest Stories, edited by Steve Moss, and translated by Asadollah Amra’ee.

داستان شب
وقتي دوباره واردِ اتاقِ خواب شد گفت:‌ "عزيزم مواظب باش پ‍ُر است."
به تخته‌يِ بالا سرِ تخت تكيه داد: "براي زنت گرفته‌اي؟"
"نه، خيلي اتفاقي گرفته‌ام. يك حرفه‌اي استخدام مي‌كنم."
"من چطورم؟"
صدايي در آورد: "خيلي باهوشي، اما كدام خري زني را اجير مي‌كند كه مردي را بكشد؟"
از مگسك خيره شد و لب را با زبان خيس كرد.
"زن تو."

Bedtime Story
“Careful, honey, it’s loaded,” he said, re-entering the bedroom.
Her back rested against the headboard. “This for your wife?”
“No. Too chancy. I’m hiring a professional.”
“How about me?”
He smirked. “Cute. But who’d be dumb enough to hire a lady hit man?”
She wet her lips, sighting along the barrel.
“Your wife.”

Written by Hassan Sharafoddin on February 12th, 2007 with 17 comments.
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